How to find a cause you love and get involved

[Photo by hobynye]

You probably see my many posts on Facebook and Twitter about Dress for Success Miami - that's my cause. Volunteering and getting involved with a cause is a great way to help others, meet new people and add some life into your work/life balance.

But where do you start? There are thousands of causes out there, all with good intentions. How do you select the one that's right for you? First, think about the following:

Your heartstrings
What pulls at you? It could be injustice, poverty, animal welfare, homelessness or any number of things. But if you are going to spend time and energy in cause, choose one that you feel personally drawn to.

Your experience
What have you done or been through that can help others? Perhaps your days as a food server in college can be channeled in a soup kitchen. It could even be a match of professional skills – I started volunteering with Dress for Success Miami by offering communications, writing and marketing services pro bono (and I still do).

Your time
Be realistic here – how much time can you commit to helping out? Is it once a week? Once a month? For certain events? It could even be taking on administrative projects you can do on your own time or in your own home. Knowing this beforehand will keep you from getting in too deep too fast and not enjoying the experience.

Now that you've picked a cause, ask around or do a search on Volunteer Match or Idealist to find an organization close to you. Contact them to get an overview of the organization and get to know the people running the place. If your gut doesn't feel good about it, it might not be the right organization for you, but don't get discouraged.

Some easy ways to get involved:

• Volunteer. Most nonprofits, especially local ones, have more demand than capacity. Find out how you can help out as a volunteer, whether it's helping deliver services (like mentoring or tutoring), staffing events (a personal favorite of mine), doing manual labor (think Habitat for Humanity) or helping out in the office (like data entry or answering phones).

• Donate/Fundraise. Time is valuable, yes, but some things do require money. Can you donate some funds? You can even help organize a fundraiser or 

• Pro bono services. If their needs fit your professional expertise, consider offering pro bono services. This is common for areas such as public relations, accounting and legal services. It helps to define a scope and set some expectations.

What does it mean to be on a nonprofit board of directors?
To be honest, I knew very little about nonprofit boards before I joined one. First and foremost, board members serve as ambassadors for a cause – representing the organization, spreading word about their good works and building relationships and good will. Most nonprofit boards also provide financial oversight and accountability for the organization. For philanthropic nonprofits, such as charities, arts organizations and those that thrive on donations, a large part of a board member's duties will include fundraising.

Are you involved in a nonprofit or volunteer cause? How did you pick one and how are you involved?

New job checklist: part II (or part I)

Now that you know what to update and what to do once you're in the job, let's backtrack a bit. Technically this part precedes that part (and technically this post preceded that post, it just got lost in my drafts), so I'm not sure whether this is Part II or Part I.

So here is the rest of the checklist (the beginning of the checklist?) for your shiny new job.

What to know

• Daily schedule and hours of business, including lunch hours
• Dress code
• Vacation/sick day procedures
• Holiday schedule
• Pay schedule and how to report time
• Performance review schedule and procedures
• Parking arrangements and permits needed (if any)
• Best rush hour route (and how long it takes)
• Available amenities (kitchenette, refrigerator, microwave, water cooler, etc.)

Who to know, aside from your superviser and coworkers

• HR representative
• IT person
• Payroll 
• Administrative staff in your department

Did I miss anything?

How to talk about dieting in the office

The cubicle life is sedentary, and it can be unhealthy. I know this all too well – since finishing grad school and entering the work force six years ago, and with irregular and unsustained bursts of activity, I've gained a good 25 pounds.

As I struggle to get back in shape, I've talked about my efforts with my coworkers. We spend 40 hours a week together and yes, we talk about things other than work. Sometimes (much of the time?) it falls into a common trap – bashing our own bodies. This is generally a social activity, but can seep into the workplace easily. Haven't seen it? You've probably missed it.

"You look great, but I'd never be able to wear that."

"I remember when I was young and my metabolism was quick."

"I need to go work out."

I'm sure you've heard similar things in your workplaces, and And it goes on and on. From normal, healthy, beautiful women.

Don't get me wrong - sometimes the comments above are actually true. Not every style works for every shape, metabolism does slow down, and working out is a good thing. But saying, and hearing, those types of comments can be hurtful, to both ourselves and others. At the very least, they can be annoying.

It's a hard habit to break, but there are two things we can do.

Stop tearing ourselves down. 
If you're giving a compliment, let it stand on its own merit; don't feel like you need to bring yourself down in the process.

Work together.
Offer a solution, like walking together during lunch or splitting meals when eating out. Or start an informal office challenge among coworkers with similar goals – see who can stick to their plan the best and celebrate milestones together.

So what do you say...who's with me in trying to change the dialogue on diets?

New job checklist

You've got the job.  You've transitioned smoothly out of your old position. Now what?

The whirlwind of starting a new job can be overwhelming. Time is a-ticking, though, so make sure you do a few things before the new job becomes old hat.

To help you out, here is a new job checklist (also a downloadable PDF). Some of these should be done immediately (like benefits enrollment) while others are just nice to do eventually (like updating your Facebook).


Update these

• Resume. The best time to add in a new job to your resume is right at the beginning, when the job   description is handy. Though your initial entry may be a near cut-and-paste, it will be much easier to change it as your job evolves than trying to hunt it down later. 

• Emergency contacts. If you have listed a daytime contact number anywhere (for example, kids' schools or childcare, condo associations, etc.), you'll have to swap out your old job's phone number. I usually put in my cell number for personal reasons, but if you're comfortable with it, you can put your new job number, too.

• LinkedIn and other professional and/or social media sites. If you have any personal memberships to professional organizations, or just Facebook, don't forget to update those, too. LinkedIn is especially important to keep up to date – it lets your professional network know where you've moved on to.

Do these

• Reevaluate your retirement plan. Whether you have a plan through your previous employer or a personal account you contribute to (or both!), now is the time to assess your retirement planning and saving. Take into account the benefits, if any, offered at your new job. Things you may consider - rolling over your 401k, increasing or decreasing your annual contributions, or the balance of investments in your portfolio.

• Revisit your budget. Your new job probably comes with a new salary, so make sure you can meet your budget. Or just look at how much more savings you'll be able to squirrel away – that's always good, too.

• Update your references. You've probably already thanked your references and let them know the outcome of the search, but it's always good to keep the lines of communication open. Now is also a great time to reach back out to any new references you approached at your most recent position (if they weren't references already).

• Benefits enrollment. Most employers give about 30 days for initial enrollment in benefits programs, and many will give you a packet of information before you start to begin musing over. Take inventory of what's being offered and find the plans that work best for you.

Once you're in the office

• Get set up. Make sure you have (or will be getting) all the things you need for your new job, such as a computer, keyboard, phone, etc. 

• Meet and greet. Who will you be working with and what will your priorities be? Sometimes your boss will have it all ready for you, but if not, it's a good idea to identify those you'll be working with closely and get to know them and what expectations they may have. 

• Set a regular schedule. Your new job may have different hours than your old one, and though the difference may be small, it could throw a hitch into your regular routine. Try a few things during your first few weeks on the job and find your rhythm again. If your employer is flexible, it may mean customizing your work schedule to your other obligations.

• Set goals. You probably know what you'll be doing, but now that you're there it's time to set some tangible goals. This is how you'll be evaluated at your first review. Be realistic but don't be afraid to aim high.

• Jump on in! The best way to get acclimated to something new is to just jump on in. Your employer has already shown they're confident in your abilities, now shine!

Download the PDF checklist here.

What do you think are must-dos when you get to your new job?

Project: Discipline

I've never been a fan of the word "discipline."

It evokes the feeling of doing what I should be doing for my own good, but with a lot of reluctance. See: practicing piano, stopping myself before helping three of french fries and putting that buttery leather bag back on the rack.

The key phrase: for my own good.

Discipline – when self-inflicted with a goal in mind – can be good.


So this year's project is discipline. I'm doing what's good for me, whether I like it or not.

Good for my body.
I want to put more good stuff in and be more active this year to get my energy up. Sure, it's always a goal, but now there's a plan and a partner in action. I'm going to drink more water, snack healthier (my weakness) and get reacquainted with the gym.

Good for my mind.
This blog is something I really enjoy, yet it's often the first thing that gets pushed off the post-work to-do list. Same with writing for pleasure. I'm going to write something every day, whether anyone sees it or not.

Good for my heart.
For some reason I have yet to pinpoint, our trip home this Christmas left me more homesick than ever. Spending time with those I care about is important, and I need more of it. I'm going to get over my phone-phobias and make an intentional effort to stay connected with friends and family near and far.


What does that mean here? More posts. More professional and style advice. More presence. (Not necessarily more of these touchy feely personal posts.)


What are you working on in your life right now?

Denim, art and other questions about starting a new job

A new job is a welcome escape from the uncertainties of the job market, but securing a job opens up another realm of uncertainties, big and small. A sampling from my mind this past week:

• Which piece of art do you bring to decorate your space? 

• Are jeans allowed on Casual Friday? Is there Casual Friday?

• How long do you wait to update your LinkedIn and Facebook profiles?

• Bring lunch or buy lunch? What's the overarching office culture?

• Where is the closest Starbucks?

• Will folks enjoy or bemoan my sense of humor?  

• Headphones or ambient music? Earbuds or over-ear?

And most importantly...

• When is it safe to bring out the brass knuckle mug?

[photo credit: former coworker B]

What questions burn when you start a new job? And really...what about the mug?

Why I went back to the office

As you may have seen on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, I started a full-time job last week. I haven't really given an update on my freelance adventure since April, but soon after that update—well, to be honest, even before that post—it was evident that I wasn't happy being a freelancer. I was happy with the flexible schedule and with the ability to choose my own projects, but I didn't feel like I was furthering my career goals. I'd always been drawn to the office environment, imagining myself in a bustling workplace, getting stuff done. In sixth grade, I dressed up as a businesswoman for Halloween (mom's suit, dad's briefcase).

Even after I'd made my decision, I wanted to see the one-year of freelancing through. The plan was to begin looking for a job when the year was up in August, but I saw a very enticing job posting in May, and I knew I'd regret it forever if I didn't apply. So I went for it. I didn't get the job I applied for, but we started a really interesting conversation that led to a new position, which I started last week.

There were a lot of factors that influenced my decision to go back to 9-to-5 work, but here are a few of the big ones.

Coworkers with common goals
Sure, I've bemoaned all types of annoying coworkers before, but I missed my downers and oddballs. Especially in my communications work, my piece of the project was usually just that—a piece. It was passed to me with clear directions (though sometimes open-ended), and it was handed back when complete, never to be seen by me again. I was part of the work, but not part of the team. And for me, that made it a little less fun. I yearned for true collaboration, for differing opinions, for seeing things through from conception through the end.

After-work hours
One of my favorite things about graduating from school and hitting the working world was getting off of work and having the rest of the evening to myself. No homework. No required reading. Being a freelancer put a damper on my me-time, or at least having regular hours. Though I'm on the East Coast, my "work hours" were still more aligned to West Coast time just because that's where my clients were. This did give me some before-work time to myself, but also meant I was sometimes doing phone meetings after dinner.

Stability and once-a-year taxes
Though I've cried and moaned every April as I've tackled taxes, I never knew how easy I had it as a regular employee. If your tax prep involves waiting for your W-2s and other statements to come each January, consider yourself lucky. A regular paycheck doesn't hurt, either, especially as we save for a house and I continue driving my 11-year-old car into the ground (I'd like to be able to pay cash when it comes time to replace it, and that kind of savings takes pre-planning).

I have plenty more to share about my decision and all the other considerations that led up to it, but I'll spare you today and spread it out over the next few weeks. As with before, I won't be discussing the details of my day job here. On the plus side, you'll be getting more outfit updates on the Facebook page (if you're into that kind of thing).

One year ago today...

One year ago today, this is what I set my foot into for the first time: our apartment in Miami. We had just come off a 17-day road trip across the country and were finally setting eyes on the place we leased sight unseen, after hunting down banks and FedEx offices in Reno, Nevada. It would be 29 days before any of our furniture arrived, and in that first month without most of our belongings we celebrated our four-year anniversary, K started his new job, and I settled into my one-year freelance experiment.

In our first year we finally bought some real furniture (couches and a dresser to replace hand-me-down futons and rolling plastic drawers), found a group of insta-friends (magnetic happy feelings and all), and scouted out all the best cheap places to park on Miami Beach. Though K has yet to adjust to Miami summers, I am happy as a clam in this climate; in fact, I'm convinced I was made to live in Miami, and am happy to be rid of winter.

Miami feels comfortable. California is comfortable, too, but Miami is no longer a wild card. For the first time in my adult life, a move has not come with an expiration date (graduation). For all I know, this is where we'll grow old and raise children, and though that realization is totally foreign to me, it's not an unpleasant thought.

So here's to Miami, and any place you've adopted as your home. I'm ready to shed my newbie status and embrace being a local.

What I've been up to...

writing

coding

researching

meeting

cleaning
mourning

planning

packing 

Facebooking

be back later

8 things you can do mid-week to unplug

Weekends are for rest, and because of that, we slave away Monday through Friday. Though it feels like a work takes up a whole day, most people have anywhere from 4-7 hours between getting off work and hitting the sack. That's 4-7 hours that you can call your own and that you should grab with both hands. I'm as much of a fan of weeknight television as anyone, but crime dramas don't often help fight stress, and sometimes it's nice to change things up.

Here are 8 weeknight breaks to help you unplug—warning: you may never want to fall back into the TV rabbit hole again. Several of these overlap (it's hard to be glued to a computer if you've got a honey mask on your face), but I hope you will run with these ideas and find some go-to midweek breaks on your own. All of these can be done with minimal planning, too.

1. No-tech night. Turn off the TV, turn off the computer, put on some music and pick up a book, magazine or project. Do anything EXCEPT for stare at a screen.

2. Girls night. Get the girls and some supplies and get to relaxing. Some fun home-spa things you can try: manicures/pedicures, sugar/salt scrubs, facial masks and hair masks. Bonus points if someone has a hot tub.

3. Movie night. The average movie is anywhere from 90-120 minutes long, which fits into your evening with plenty of time to spare. Why wait until Friday to catch the latest blockbuster? Lines are probably shorter on weekdays, too. 

4. Craft night. If you're a weekend crafter like I am, you know how frustrating and slow progress can be when you only give it a project a few glances a week. Pick a small project or a simple step within a large project that takes less than two hours, and get it out of the way.

5. Game night. Board games, video games or bowling, a mid-week game night with family or friends is a great stress buster (and I have the bowling injuries to prove it). Check out your local bowling alley's weekly specials—you'll probably find some great deals for a few hours of old school fun.

6. Book club. Create your own or join one, even if you gab and gossip more than you actually discuss the book. My last book club also included themed food (fair fare for Devil in the White City and pierogies for The Master and Margarita). Bonus: you could *gasp* learn something!

7. Supper club. Whether it's cooking with your live-in or some friends, picking out a recipe and making it can be a fun experience (and you get some yummy grub out of it). If you're doing a group meal, let each person pick a course and bring ingredients (and any special tools to make it) and cook together. Note: this is much much easier if the person with the biggest kitchen hosts. Just sayin'.

8. Date night. The last year I lived in California, K taught a late afternoon class on Mondays just a few blocks from my office. He got into the habit of taking the train there (a reimbursable expense for him), and I would pick him up after work and check out a different restaurant each week. Mondays were so much fun (and the restaurants were way less crowded).


How do you unplug and relax mid-week?

Do what you love or love what you do?

As I've been mulling over direction in my career and my random list of life goals, one question that pops into my mind is whether it's better to do what you love or love what you do.

Do what you love advocates following your passion to finding a career.

Love what you do is finding peace and enjoyment in whatever your career may be.

They are not mutually exclusive, but for many people they are different.

Do what you love
Pros: Following your passion to a career obviously has it's benefits—you're doing something you love everyday! It's also motivating to see something close to you come together and succeed, and it's much easier to do that if you're dedicated to it as a career instead of as a side hobby.

Cons: Depending on what it is you like about your love-based career, passion can run out. Committing to something full time can take the mystery and appeal out of a career choice, and it's easy to get overwhelmed by the actual daily tasks involved.


Love what you do
Pros: You get enjoyment out of your career—maybe not every second of every day, but overall, you love what you get to do. You're making a living to support the hobbies you love, whether it be travel, sports or shopping. If your work is a separate entity from your hobbies or loves, there is often a clearer delineation between work life and time and personal life and time.

Cons: This kind of career choice can sometimes lead to feeling like you're working toward someone else's goals instead of your own. You also won't get as much time to devote to your passion if you're working 40 hours a week (plus lunch breaks and commute time).


Can you have both?
Sure. For some careers and passions it will be easier to find the intersection (for example, writing can be a viable career and hobby) and for others it will be difficult (if you're an accountant by day and a musician by night). Also, if you love what you do, it can often begin feeling like you're doing what you love—love can be fostered (in work and in relationships, but that's a different topic).


Personally, I've always thought "love what you do" was more reasonable, but in hindsight, I've actually done quite a bit of doing what I love. Love of magazines—from planning to proofing and everything in between—is what spurred me on to apply to journalism school in the first place (after getting my BA in an unrelated field), and though I veered from the conventional publishing rat race, all of my jobs have had a writing, editing and publishing bent. I guess I'm lucky that what I love is also a conventional career option, and it's been interesting this year to see it from a different angle as a freelancer.

If you're dead-set on doing what you love and haven't taken that step yet, I really like Leo Babauta's Do-What-You-Love-Guide (and his entire Zen Habits blog).

What do you think—would you rather do what you love or love what you do? Or have you found the happy intersection?

Four questions to ask when you're lacking direction

 [flickr: pursuethepassion]

Like I mentioned last month in my freelance update, I've been thinking a lot about direction. Specifically, I've been focusing on a few questions (and some list-making) to help me along, and boy, has it helped! Here's what I've been mulling over.

What are you passionate about?
What gets your goat? This isn't quite the same as "what do you love?" (for example, one can be passionate about addressing poverty, but it'd be weird to call it "love"), but also any issues or industries that really get you fired up, angry or excited. It can be as exciting as rocket science or as seemingly mundane as accounting. I also wouldn't choose just one thing...write down a few.

What are you good at?
Let's be realistic: I'm not good at everything and neither are you. Heck, I'm not even good at the things I love sometimes (my dust-covered guitar can tell you that much). Write your strengths down. Now look at your passion list: how do your strengths fit into your passion industries? If you don't know enough about your passions, find out more. A lot of times it's just finding the right company or organization to rekindle your passion and set you in the right direction. Make a list of career options that combine your passion and skill.

Where do you want to be?
This could be a specific location, a specific job position, or a specific industry. It may help to break it down into bite-size time goals, for example, I want to be in x position within 5 years and at x point in my career 15 years from now. This could also include lifestyle choices, such as if you want the flexibility to stay at home part time with children or the freedom and budget to travel to your heart's desire. Compare this to your list of career options...which careers on this list will help you get there?

How do you get there?
Though you may realize where you currently are is not helping you get where you want to be, don't jump just yet. Where do you need to be to get there, and how do you get to that starting point? It could mean picking up a few new skills on your personal time, or just starting to look for that perfect job. Make a plan and a timeline for getting on track.

The issue I often deal with is narrowing down my passions. I'm easily excitable and enthusiastic. The question that helps me most is "Where do you want to be?" My list may be slightly long, but over the past few weeks I've prioritized it so that I can work toward the goal and still have some fallback options.

How did you find your career direction? Any other questions that should be considered?

How to say no at happy hour

 [Flickr: The Vault DFW]

The office environment can be a lot like high school, except everyone's old enough to drink and vote. There are cliques, just like high school. There are popular people and the not so popular, like high school. There is gossip and drama and hurt and friendship.

And, just like high school, there is peer pressure. Sometimes it's good, like when you spur each other on to reach your highest potential. Sometimes it's bad, like when you're sexually harassed. Sometimes, it's just there, like at happy hour. It's those gray areas that aren't right or wrong that can often cause the most headache.

How can happy hour be at all stressful? It has been for me, since I don't drink alcohol. I have nothing against it, but alcohol and Angeline just don't mix. If I'm not breaking out in itchy red hives all over, I'm having hot flashes and chills, and that's only half a drink in. I've heard of some people conditioning themselves to handle it, but I've tried and it's just not worth it anymore. Plus, I've never been cool, so I have no real rep to keep up. Your reasons may be different from mine, but we don't have to let our teetotaling get in the way of networking.

Participate
Happy hour can be an extremely valuable part of the professional experience, whether you're at a networking event or celebrating Friday with your coworkers. You don't have to go to every one, but make sure to participate somewhat regularly to stay in the loop.

Don't make it a big deal 
Just don't order an alcoholic drink. If someone asks you why, you can tell them the reason or make an excuse. Say it once—you don't need a long explanation. (My go-to: "Oh, I don't drink." ::smile::)

Indulge a little
My happy hour drink of choice is Coke or Diet Coke, and because I don't drink soda often, I'm still sharing in the slightly indulgent feel. Or I'll dig into the cheap happy hour eats (truffle fries, anyone?).

Don't be empty handed
Whether it's a sparkling water, a soda, or a virgin cocktail, if you have something in your hand, people will soon forget it's not alcohol. Ask for a garnish on your drink if you want it to feel extra special.

Laugh it off
If your coworkers are the teasing type, this may just be the thing they need to poke fun at you every once in a while. Play along, in moderation. If they bring the teasing into the workplace, you can throw it right back with a positive spin. I may not participate in the Friday drinking games, but I can rock a last-minute deadline or all-nighter as good as (OK, better than) the rest of them, so if they call me a goody-two-shoes, I'll correct them: I'm a goody-two-shoes-who-is-awesome-at-my-job.

What kind of peer pressure do you get in your office or at work events? How do you address it?

Me and the bean

The Bean (what kind of bean did you think I was talking about?)

How is it already Friday? (Yes, I still ask that every Friday.) Finally letting my confession out this Monday really spurred me on. Knocked out a few projects, sent out a pitch, purchased and downloaded My So-Called Freelance Life (thanks to Catherine) and committed to trying out a business networking group next week.

The other fire under my buns was my annual Chicago vacation (which in freelance terms means a bring-your-work-with-you and stay-glued-to-your-email kind of trip...I'm not baller enough to be able to put my two projects on hold yet). There's something about this city that drew me in when I first visited as an 18 year old, and I'm so lucky that I get to come out once a year during K's work conference. Spouses on work trips can be awkward, but I gladly leave him and his colleagues alone all day to find my own adventures. The icing on the cake is the weekend, when the conference begins petering out and K and I get to visit with my cousins and their families nearby.

I've been to the Cloud Gate sculpture (lovingly known as The Bean) before, but I hadn't spent much time there until now. I woke up bright and early on my first morning in town, sauntered over to Intelligentsia for some joe, and then grabbed a seat in Millenium Park, which was still empty aside from security and one other morning person. I sat there for 30 minutes while I nursed my coffee, taking in the bean, the buildings and the birds. By the time my cup was empty, the place was abuzz with the day's visitors, so I grabbed my fancy camera and joined in on the fun.

The best part? Helping a couple take their photo with the bean and inadvertently photobombing it with my reflection in the metal. You're welcome, folks!

I was so happy, I even attempted an outfit shot for y'all (attempted being the operative word).

H&M jacket, Merona top from Target, Gap skinny pants, Target flats

Freelance Files | The halfway point (an honest look)

Depending on when you start counting, I've been at this freelancing thing for about eight months. Goodness, that seems like a long time.

How's it working out for me?

In some ways, it's been good. In others, not so much.

By the time this post goes up, it will have been over a week since I first typed out most of it. Since then I've been editing, sleeping on it, editing some more, sleeping on the new versions and debating both internally and externally about how much to put out there. When your professional life is on the Internet, it's important to filter what you say. I still believe that, but I also believe in being human and allowing myself a measured level of vulnerability.

A lot of bloggers have gone freelance lately in a variety of fields. Looking in from the outside, things look so hunky dory, and, to be honest, though I keep a smile on my face and look on the bright side, freelancing has been a less than rosy road. Lest anyone think freelancing is super-easy or that bloggers are super-humans, I'm throwing (some, not all) caution to the wind and letting you in on my true freelance experience so far.

So here goes. Let's start on a positive note.

The good:

• My flexible schedule has allowed me to take on some volunteer and pure pet projects, such as Dress for Success Miami (where I'm also on the board), more online writing and helping friends with their nonprofits. Though I don't get paid, this has exposed my work to new networks here in Miami, though I have yet to really foster those into business opportunities.
• Added one new client to my paid work (which also includes two ongoing contracts and a freelance editing client).
• My apartment is cleaner than ever.

The not-so-good:

• Fear. I am an introvert. I have major anxiety when it comes to new situations and putting myself out there. It used to be a paralyzing hide-in-a-hole-for-days/weeks/months and avoid-all-human-interaction kind of fear, but now it's a slightly watered down version of that. The computer is a great facade to hide behind. What has been most helpful in the past is having a few folks I trust as sounding boards, and I'm still building that group here in Miami.  
• Lack of direction. What brings in most of my small freelance income (grants) is not what I was educated in or wanted as a career goal (magazine journalism) or what my resume shows as my strength (nonprofit communications). I truly enjoy all three of these fields, but I wonder whether I need to narrow my focus. And then there are the things I would love to do someday, like write a book or make things with my hands for a living. How should my profession and my passion relate to one another now and how will they in the future?  

Side note: One or two people asked about freelance and finances in the reader survey, and my answer doesn't add up to a full post, so I thought I'd address it here. One of the reasons I went freelance was because my husband got a full-time job; previously he was a graduate student/TA while I worked full time. Because we basically just switched roles, our household finances have not changed—we make about the same overall, spend about the same and save about the same. No real adjustments there.

When I originally decided to freelance, I gave myself a timeline: one year and then it was decision time. Either commit to this freelance thing or get off my butt and go back to full-time work. My random indicator of "success" was going to be whether I could make 50% of my previous full-time income through freelance work (so far I'm at 21%) . I have no idea whether this is realistic or not (any freelancers remember how year one went?), so I may choose another indicator when the time comes. Since I started in August, I'm giving myself until this August (mid or late). Five months to go.

I may not be where I wanted to be at this point in freelancing. But I do know my biggest challenge: me. No one and nothing else is responsible for my lack of progress. I'm the only one that I can make any changes here. It's slightly depressing, but at the same time, completely empowering.

The first step to overcoming a problem is admitting you have one, so this is my confession. And since I have yet to solidify a professional sounding board here in Miami, I hope you don't mind acting as one in the meantime.

Time to get to work.

Must-watch: Miss Representation

After months and months of searching spurred on by my friend's post on this in October, I finally got myself to a local screening of Miss Representation yesterday. The film explores the role of women in society, power and media and also discusses the history of female portrayals in the media.

The film had a personal start—Jennifer Siebel Newsom was pregnant with her first child, a girl, and was concerned over the society her child would be raised in. Yes, a lot has changed over the years, but at the same time, it's amazing how little it has changed.

• There is less diversity (in types of roles and occupations, etc.) in female leads in today's films than female film protagonists in the 50s. Even "strong" female action heros conform to the male definition of sexiness (you can't fight crime without a corset).

• The U.S. is 90th in the world in terms of women in national legislatures. Rwanda, Iraq and China all have more women in their legislatures than the U.S.

• The number of cosmetic surgical procedures performed on youth 18 or younger more than tripled from 1997 and 2007.

• Women in the public eye are more likely to be judged for their appearance and beauty than men. Media often jumps straight to how a female looks rather than their qualifications.

• Women are also often pitted against each other even when competition isn't there, creating the perception that we are working against each other, when in reality women are often each others' biggest supporters.

The film also talked to teen girls about their experiences and their perceptions of being a woman today. It was both heartbreaking and encouraging. These girls want to be taken seriously and recognize that women are unfairly treated. And yet, they are hard on themselves and on their own bodies even though they are beautiful and smart. One girl, who couldn't have been older than 15 or 16 years old, shared about her younger sister, who was depressed and cutting herself because she was not happy with her own body.

So what can we do? I came away from the screening with a few ideas to apply to my own life.

• Stop judging other women based on their looks. I am extremely guilty of falling into the trap of criticizing other womens looks in private, especially when they are on my television or in my magazine. Even though the things I say to myself or to my friends and spouse will likely never reach the ears of the individual, the attitude of judgement is toxic and is probably the thing I like least about myself (the quick rush to judgement). I also want to stop jumping to judgement of women who do opt for cosmetic procedures or do things to make themselves look or feel better (in their opinions).

• Support and encourage other women in their endeavors. I love watching other women succeed, and in fact these women are my role models, but I could be better about encouraging those in my own life and helping publicize those I see online. The disparity between the 51% of Americans who are women and the 17% of Congress that is female is huge, and though I don't have political aspirations myself, I hope that those of you who do are not afraid to throw your hat into the ring. I don't believe in voting for women because of their gender (I'm more of an issues person), but more women on the ballot means more choices and more chances for fair representation.

• Be an example by showing my satisfaction with the body and beauty I've been given. It is extremely heartwrenching for me to hear girls and women (including my friends) talk about their dissatisfaction with their physical traits, especially when I know they are beautiful. This dissatisfaction is so pervasive and accepted that I think a lot of women who are happy with their looks are ashamed to let others know they are happy with the way they look. It makes me even more aware of what I put on this blog, too, and while I have never espoused a certain body or beauty type, I'm reassessing any subliminal messages I might be sending and how to intentionally send a solidly positive message.

As you can tell, this film touched me tremendously. I highly recommend that you watch it, too.

Check out the trailer:


 Find a screening in your area here, or find out how to host one.

Have you seen Miss Representation? How do you feel about the role of women in the United States today? What else can we do to make the world better for girls and the future?

It's been fun, folks...

...but it's time to say goodbye to our regular rendezvous here. It's not you, it's me.

I'll still be all over the Internets chirping away and updating The New Professional Facebook page, and you know how to reach me if you need me. You may even see semi-regular outfit pics on Twitter and Facebook (no promises). I'll also be posting every so often on my personal website, though in a much less focused and disciplined form than I've been doing here. I've truly enjoyed getting to know you, and am definitely still available to answer any of your questions and to dispense free advice on anything (though I must warn, my expertise is rather limited). I certainly haven't run out of words.

I'm still in shock that anyone reads this blog. Some of you may even have been around since the beginning. I love each and every one of you crazies. Thanks for making this the most popular hobby I've ever had.

Thankful

I have quite a few thank-you cards in my card box, but this one is my fave. Down to my last one.

It's been quite the year, hasn't it? I have a lot to be thankful for.

• A safe and relatively uneventful cross-country move and a really good job for K
• New friends and our new church in Miami
• Family all over the country (and world), and a healthy new baby nephew
• Dear friends in Sacramento and Davis, who made me feel at home for the past four years
• My former job and the opportunities it continues to give me
• A roof over our heads and food in our fridge
• A modern dishwasher
• Good health for myself and my family
• The ocean view from our window
• Palm trees
• Airplanes
• Internet, phone, Skype, FaceTime
• Southern California, which feels more and more like home the further I move away
• A ton of other stuff that I won't bore you with

Happy Thanksgiving! Be back Tuesday. 

Business as usual [outfit]

White blouse from Macy's - 2007 - gift card / Gap sweater - 2005 - $20? / Limited skirt - 2009 - $20 on sale / Enzo Angiolini pumps from Piperlime - 2010 - $35 / Necklace c/o Jada's Jewels - 2011

This is the most professional outfit I've worn in weeks. I'm not quite sure what it was (probably the fact that it was a Monday after a vacation), but I was just feeling it. I wanted the dressed up feeling. I wanted to wear heels. I didn't go far in this outfit, but it felt good while I was in it.

Now onto this sweater. I don't wear it often, but I've had it a long time and will probably never get rid of it. I remember the details of my purchasing the piece pretty clearly.

Let me set the scene.

Early September 2005. I recently moved to New York City begin grad school at NYU. One of the activities on our orientation week schedule is a job/internship fair. I only have three semesters to soak in all the journalism I can before I'm likely headed back to California, so I print out a stack of resumes and hit up some tables. I drop off a couple of resumes.

A few days later (I think it was the first week of classes) I have a free afternoon, so I decide to take a stroll over to Broadway in Soho to check out the shops. It's just a few blocks from my school-issued shared studio, and right before I get there, next to a wrought iron gate, I get a phone call. It's Time Inc. As in publisher of Real Simple, People magazine, In Style. I dropped off my resume and chatted with their internship coordinator a bit at the job fair, and it was at the top of my dream list.

After silently squealing in joy for a few seconds, I listen closely as the woman invites me in for an interview. I can't remember if she mentions what magazine or not, but no matter. I'm already in shopping mode, so I switch my mission to finding the perfect interview outfit. I walk into the Gap and head straight for the sale racks, since I'm fresh out of college and surviving on student loans and minimal savings. No luck. But then cable knit catches my eye. There are stacks of it in various colors on some shelves. And a small sign that says, "hey, these are on sale, too!" Not in those exact words. And that is how this sweater came to be mine.

I wore this sweater over this tie-neck top (purchased the same day) with black Forever 21 pants and red Payless flats. I remember feeling like I belonged in a country club. It must have gone well, since I got the internship (not with one of the big name mags, but with a smaller, custom publication). It was an awesome three semesters.

What clothing items do you still own and wear that hold the greatest memories?

Freelance Files | Time management

For anyone who thought my desk might actually look like this on a normal day, here is a more accurate picture of my "tidy" desk during the week. And yes, this is after clearing off space.

True story: I opened up this window to type this post around 5:30 p.m. last night. And right now it's 8:30 a.m. and these are the first words on the screen. Although I had some ambitious time management plans when I first started out this freelancing thing, reality has set in. I was always really adept at juggling multiple projects at work, prioritizing what had to get done, and churning out lots and lot of stuff. But fewer deadlines and unclear priorities are a new beast for me (I can take my personal projects at my own pace right? Um...do I ever want them to get done?). Some thoughts on my current time management situation:

• One of the things I was looking forward to most about freelancing was a more flexible schedule. Lunch with friends, more time for hobbies, the ability to join weekday Bible studies. Not to take away from my work time, but mostly because I knew freelancing was not an 8-5 job. Sometimes it's a 12-10 job, sometimes 3-midnight. I don't want to over-plan my day, either.
• Much (ok, almost all) of my work so far is for clients in California. This has been a huge blessing and it's really great to continue work relationships with people I love working with, but has got my hours a little wonky, since they're basically working 12-8. I do really like getting a head start in the morning on them, though...definitely keeps me from more late nights.
• Training for a half marathon has totally thrown my schedule upside down. Exercise was never part of the plan. If you include running time, warm-up/cool-down time, and taking time to eat a nutritious breakfast time, that adds about 1.5 hours to my morning routine 4-5 times a week. 

Things I'm learning about managing my time:

• One to-do list. Rather than the multiple to-do lists I'm accustomed to keeping, since my life is much more fluid and flexible, I'm using just one list. 
• Take breaks when needed. Not just computer breaks (although those are important), but coffee breaks, reading breaks, and breaks from the race of keeping up with other blogs and social networks. 
• Make appointments. If I want to have lunch with a friend, I schedule it days in advance when possible. I also have standing volunteer hours at Dress for Success Miami, which is great to add structure to my day. Not only do appointments help me chunk up my work time and use it better, it also gives me something to look forward to and measure toward during the week.
• Realize I don't have to plan every minute, especially when it comes to my workouts. I prefer morning workouts, but a) it's been hard to get up in the mornings lately (soreness from this new exercise thing doesn't help) and b) sometimes I get inspired when I wake up and sit down and start typing million-word blog posts like this. To keep myself on track, I make sure to put on my gym clothes in the morning and then when I do get to a stopping point, run down to the gym in my building knowing that once I get on that treadmill, it's a bigger pain to stop than it is to keep going.
• Do something. Anything. It doesn't have to be for money. It doesn't have to be for a larger goal. Doing begats more doing, so instead of thinking about my website while browsing blogs, I'm trying to close the browser and start working on the website instead (writing in Word, for example...I know I'll need to open up the browser again to actually do web work). 
• No more caffeine after noon. Iced tea with last night's dinner was a bad move, but I now have a whole pageful of notes and ideas (things I can do right away) that I took on my iPad under the covers. I'm paying for it this morning, though, so time to rein it in. This one's a party animal, can you tell?

What are your biggest time management challenges?